ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
