I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
