wat bout pragnant strippers??
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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