Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Randomize
