And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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