He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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