so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
