he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
