im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
