I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
