I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
