Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I have aggressive nipples.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Randomize
