The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
I just gargled with NyQuil
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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