That's when you crack a 10am beer
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
