Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
