You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
