I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Sext me about skeletons
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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