I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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