You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize
