No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
now i know why i became what i already was.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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