My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
