Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
