I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Randomize
