Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
