I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
