pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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