the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
There was a lot of him and a little penis
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
