Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
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