Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
