She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
