Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
How naked do you want me to be?
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Oh and itβs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ππππ¬π³π
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize