you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize
