i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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