Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
