I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize