He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
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