she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
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