They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
