i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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