I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Randomize
