Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Dignity is for republicans.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Randomize
