I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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