I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize