Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
