just come out here and I will go home with you...
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Is her dick bigger than yours?
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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