He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
