are you so shy because you have an std?
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
