too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Randomize
