i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Randomize
