A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
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