yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
